They don’t notice the women that are interested in being approached and wind up missing out on golden opportunities to meet amazing women. 1 It’s a person’s way of saying, “Get away from me, creep,” without, you know, actually saying it. IF a man makes eye contact with a woman … For more advice on what to do when a woman makes eye contact with you, check out this article on how to make eye contact without being creepy, and how to how to start an engaging conversation in any social setting. However, once a guy learns to pick up and act on these signals he’ll find openings to meet women anywhere he goes. Depending on where you are, the “flavor” of eye contact will be different, so it’s important to be attuned to this. Well, there is some truth in this AS LONG AS she is happy when she’s looking at you, relaxed in her body language and vibe (or nervous in a happy way!). Through eye contact, you can easily tell if a girl is into you. I can honestly say that I have never in my life gotten even one sign of interest from any woman – I’m 36. I certainly do. But what if she avoids looking at you? The reason that a woman might hold prolonged eye contact with a man could be that she is annoyed with him. Attract Women Naturally. It’s like a seesaw. "I went through the ebook this week, and it was truly enlightening... not just in how I'm attractive to women, but also in a what's important to me as a man and human being." If you waste the first invitation, you may not get another one. “Reading Her Signs of Interest: Eye Contact”. It definitely doesn’t mean they don’t like you; it can be a variety of reasons. If you don’t do anything about it she’ll think it’s because you’re not interested. 3 Ways to improve your eye contact. Make sure he’s maintained that eye contact after a little while before thinking anything of it. If, on the other hand, you hold eye-contact for too long, you will be unnervingly intense. Sarah Jones is founder and CEO of Introverted Alpha; the premier dating coaching company for introverted men; featured by Forbes, Business Insider, Cosmo, and more. When an older woman makes eye contact with you, holds it for a long time, smiles, doesn’t stop, and won’t look away… You’re starting to have eye sex. Remember that healthy eye contact is usually somewhere in between 50% and 70% of the conversation. Some guys simply don’t realize eye contact means anything. In the heights of sexual intimacy, Level (-1) is subterranean. There is … Eye contact tells you a lot. But we can certainly make a “crash” less likely when we use the “training wheels” of a gentle smile. If you are focused on her beauty ONLY, then you will be ignoring yourself, which means your sense of self will fade into the background. If you lock eyes with a girl and she immediately looks down and away, that’s a sign of embarrassment. But a woman who is in love with you may find it hard to maintain eye contact. If you make eye contact with a girl, and then she looks away for a few seconds before locking eyes with you again, she’s open to an approach. The problem is most guys don’t know how to read the signs of interest women give off. People make eye contact for many different reasons, but if a woman is making eye contact with you, it’s best to play it safe and assume she likes you. Of everything that was going on in her head and everything else going on around her she was struck by you and you have momentarily shifted her focus. A study conducted in 1989 assures that simple eye contact could make a person fall in love with you (Kellerman, Lewis, and Laird). Noteworthy effects come from a deeper sense of confidence and purpose. If she is staring at you from across the room and looks away as soon as you meet her eyes, she could have just been spacing out in your direction and came back when you made eye contact. I take this fact as a sign that I am of no interest to women whatsoever and as such don’t bother approaching anyone because rejection would always be guaranteed. Now you know what to do when a woman makes eye contact with you. Do NOT flinch or look away. When you make eye contact with a cute girl and she looks away, make sure you keep looking long enough for her to peek back at you and see you are still looking at her. Will it be perfectly natural from Attempt #1? We pass by people every day without really noticing them or thinking twice about them. When you start to look at eye contact as an invitation you’ll notice there are more opportunities to meet women than you may have thought. As for eye contact specifically once a good level of confidence is built, here are a few key things you can do for that part…, The first principle of great eye contact is answering this question…. Pick up your free copy of Sarah's 22-page ebook inside the blue box just below. If rolls where reverse’ it would be a different story for men, general comets by women , I feel uncomfortable , he keeps looking at me , and so on …many times women either over react or you may find a women that is okay but, it is getting more difficult. It’s always easier to approach a woman who wants to be approached. Suddenly just walking down the street or shopping for groceries can turn into fantastic opportunities to meet women. You want to be able to distinguish casual glances from invitations to talk. Women use eye contact as a sign of interest everywhere. Required fields are marked *. If you have to drift away, make sure your eyes … When a woman makes eye contact with you and you find her beautiful, let yourself enjoy not only her beauty but your own attractiveness as well. "I especially like how you’re a strong alternative to short-term, shallow PUA tactics." There isn't enough time to dally around here. If she is unhappily looking away, then certainly don’t keep looking at her. All rights reserved. Maintaining eye contact is something that many people do when they’re feeling confident. That’s because the truth is there is not something wrong with you. - J.O. If someone seems angry at you, they may be holding your eyes to make a point. People can subconsciously tell if a smile is real or fake. But if you DO make eye contact with her or return her eye contact, then the opposite great things happen! Another study revealed that eye contact AND smiling together … The reason is women are more sensitive to body language cues. Or to give an “impish smile” which truly sounds awful and calculated… how in the world are you supposed to manage your smile while also having any noteworthy effect on her? So if you’re still building up your sense of self, then focusing on that helps you to be present to your own attractiveness, in addition to hers. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. What seems subtle to us guys is really painfully obvious to most girls. When you look someone directly in the eyes, their body produces chemica… Before you can really determine what prolonged eye contact means, you really have to consider the situation. Well, of COURSE, you are going to feel awkward! Here, life coach Ali Campbell – author of More Than Just Sex — tells Ben Jackson how to work out when a woman is eyeing you up. It’s normal for people to glance at one another and make eye contact with strangers for about a second before looking away and moving on. You may have heard it said that the first person to look away is the “weaker” one and that should be reserved for her. (1) She knows that you’re interested and confident enough to express that, which is not only attractive but also gives you two somewhere to take things from there. Exception: If you’re making eye contact with a woman you don't know, go for 1-2 seconds. Look for these chances and you’ll find them. Remember how I said that it’s not your fault that you’ve not been able to hold eye contact for long before now? The risk of letting her walk out of your life is too big to take. From a guy’s point of view women can appear very subtle when it comes to showing signs of interest. The Art of Charm Bootcamp is a revolutionary school for men created by a team of social dynamics experts that have taken thousands of guys from ordinary to extraordinary. Feel out the flavor of the eye contact based on the lightness or darkness of where you are. (a) your own sense of self which feels good, (b) her attractiveness which also feels good. So pay attention to his eyes and make sure you pick up on his subtle (or not so subtle) signs he’s trying to give out. Whereas, if she reacts to seeing you by doing things such as: If a girl makes eye contact with you, looks away, and then looks back at you all within about 30 seconds…she’s interested. Hi there! View all posts by Brian M →. “Flavor” means the feeling of the eye contact, how you and she sense it…. If you make eye contact with a girl, and then she looks away for a few seconds before locking eyes with you again, she’s open to an approach. This means she is physically interested in you. Next time you’re out and about and see a woman walking by, try and make eye contact with her and maintain it until she breaks it. When you do this, you will start to notice some very strange things happening. You’re out with friends, and a woman has caught your eye. Your eyes can do far more talking than your words. You have also learned that making eye contact makes you feel confident and strong. On one end of the spectrum, too much eye contact can be creepy, and on the other end of the spectrum comes off dismissive and uninterested. Discover what makes you naturally attractive in this 22-page ebook PDF, for free. This is especially true for introverted men, who are naturally more reserved by nature. It could be a complete accident and he’s just spacing out. Another thing to look for is prolonged eye contact. Nope. She already feels like she’s given you the green light. (1) First, take a deep breath, and recall courageous times when you were enduring pain or discomfort in other ways and stayed with it for your own growth, like in a marathon or even just a casual Sunday jog, but staying with it instead of stopping the moment you feel a bit tired. If you are anywhere with a daytime vibe, like at the gym, on the street, or at the grocery store; it will be more light and friendly naturally. Eye contact is a powerful connection between two human beings. To brush off these moments of eye contact or chalk them up to “maybe she’s interested, I’ll wait for another sign” is a big mistake. And last but not least, prolonged eye contact can get you noticed anywhere. As for how to do that overall big-picture, our Launch Your Dating Life program is a straight ticket to that. Women will also lower their eyes in submission. When a man and a woman engage in prolonged eye contact, they usually have this incredible sexual tension that makes them stare. But if she seems to really like you and she feels shy as she pleasantly looks away, then her getting to do that first does set a nice leadership tone from your end, a nice boldness that both of you can rest into and enjoy. In contrast, men employ eye contact to mark status and dominance (men stare more than women). how to make eye contact without being creepy, How to Get Matches on Hinge: Checklist of 7 Quick Fixes, #1 Thing You Must Not Say on a First Date, How to Date Again After a Hiatus or Heartbreak, 6 Reasons Extroverted Women Love Introverted Men. It doesn’t have to be long, just three seconds or so is plenty. By writing about interpersonal dynamics, he’s finally able to put that psychology degree to good use. Notice how when a woman makes eye contact with you It means nothing more than her showing interest, there’s no such thing as her being in love at first sight, she might be interested at first sight and then fall in love with you quickly because of your charm and high level of creating rapport and building strong bonds. (2) You feel awesome and powerful, which then reinforces that confidence she sensed from you in the first place! 3 It always seem’s the onus keeps falling back to the male as it usually does , if women want to attract then it is not our fault if they do not make their intentions clear. You might just turn red and run out of things to say. Eye contact is a powerful stimulator of love and affection. if you are making eye contact it means you need to get together, she really likes you. No fake and distracting manipulation of facial muscles needed! It’s a gift, not a struggle, even though it does take boldness. You’ll learn our top strategies to improve your career, confidence, lifestyle, and love-life from top experts like life and business-hackers. How do you hold eye contact when you’re quite nervous? Before you go, would you like my ebook? (This is until you have SUCH a strong sense of self that you don’t even have to think of it anymore; it’s just always there supporting you… and that takes time and practice, so it’s okay if you’re still working on it!). A 2005 study showed that we perceive people as more attractive when they shift their direction of gaze towards us and make eye contact with us. In this study two opposite sex strangers were asked to gaze into each others eyes for two minutes, which in some cases was enough to produce passionate feelings for each other. Something as simple as a little eye contact may make her feel like she’s screaming “Come talk to me!” but a lot of guys will dismiss it. The way you make eye contact can make or break a situation: If you tend to look away when a woman makes eye contact with you, then several problems can come from that: (1) She may think you’re not interested (and if you’re looking away, you may not have the guts to show her otherwise, which means she’ll keep thinking you’re not interested). The first thing you need to do is to get them to notice you. He stumbled across The Art of Charm podcast and eventually signed up for an AoC bootcamp. This would be more likely if she only does it with him and if something had recently happened that would cause her to be annoyed with him. Keep it in tune with your emotions and don’t fight it. ), Now onto another facet of what to do when a woman makes eye contact with you: your smile…, Perhaps you’ve heard that you shouldn’t smile, that it makes you seem people-pleasing…. That’s what you get to experience in this moment with her. [Read: 30 subtle, obvious, and really sexy flirting tips] What prolonged eye contact really means and how to perfect this flirty move. Don’t try to read too much into something unless it’s obvious he’s trying to make eye contact with you. They can make a woman feel ecstatic and anxious and ladies utilize it as a big measure of your self-confidence- making intimate eye contact will attract a woman for sure. When you walk around, try holding eye contact with women that you are attracted to. For a lot of guys, the tendency is to look away. There can be many reasons as to why someone won’t make eye contact when having a conversation with you. It’s normal for people to glance at one another and make eye contact with strangers for about a second before looking away and moving on. So if you’re buying a car or dealing with someone you think is shady, look them in the eyes. A great rule of thumb to make your eye-contact strong – but not creepy – is to hold eye contact until the girl looks away. After all, eyes are a window to the soul. What’s down in the well comes up in the bucket. >> Women are like robots and need to see random calculated looks or smiles to “fall for you”…, >> You have to be the “life of the party” type guy to be comfortable with eye contact and with dating in general…, >> The cards are stacked against you because you’re introverted…. If you’re engaged in a conversation, then the level of eye contact she keeps can show how interested she is. You have to consider the circumstances and your relationship to that person. Beyond the lowest level of eye contact, this is when someone is not only not making eye contact with you, but they’re consciously making an effort to NOT look at you. I have never seen it fail. Rather, there is something wrong with what you’ve been LEARNING and APPLYING. #4 – Hold Eye Contact To Make People Tell You The Truth. Others may think it’s a possible sign, but are unsure, so they wait for another one to confirm she’s interested. She’s probably interested, but just feels shy. Another thing to look for is prolonged eye contact. Become A Benevolent Badass. If you feel reluctant to make eye contact when he's around or when you're talking, then this … - K.K. In fact, she seems to be looking at you right now…. This is why you want to look for a particular form of eye-contact: the three-part glance. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Just by looking into each other’s eyes they feel hurricanes of lust rising from within, making them crave each other like crazy. It won’t take long to see quite a few girls will give you a second glance. I am generalising, I think a lot of men just keep clear as it too easy for them to be accused for what ever, burnt once or twice , so, what is the point in the end and women wonder why. In addition, it is also noticeable if a married woman likes you because, probably, she will be the one who starts the eye contact and does it frequently to make it clear that there is an attraction and that interest has been awakened by you. So, what’s behind successfully responding to a woman when she makes eye contact with you? Attract women naturally, without being someone you’re not. Prolonged eye contact with your crush makes you feel nervous, but at the same time, you secretly feel excited. Yay! When a woman makes eye contact with you and…. So what we want to do is CLEAN OUT the gunk in there so that it’s only (or mostly only) your awesomely attractive vibe left! You do that by looking at them, and not looking away. That is exactly what we do in Phase 1 of Launch Your Dating Life. 95% of the time she’ll break it first and quite quickly; this is because most women are just as anxious about making eye contact as most guys are. Research out of Tufts University found that eye contact makes people more honest. Sometimes a guy might not be making eye contact with you on purpose. Holding prolonged eye contact with you Then it would be more likely that she is attracted to you and that she looked down for that reason. “AOC,” “The Art of Charm” and “Art of Charm School” are registered trademarks of The Art of Charm, Inc. Jordan Harbinger is no longer affiliated with Art of Charm, Inc. Use of Jordan Harbinger’s name, image, likeness, and appearance is made with his consent and under license. As soon as your crush makes eye contact with you, let a nice big smile show on your face. How long do I look at her before looking away? Brian M - author of 191 posts on The Art of Charm, Once he realized attraction was something he could learn, Brian spent way too much of his free time studying and practicing everything he could find on the subject. I completely zone out, my mind focusing on something completely different, and I no longer even see what I’m looking at. Of course, not every glance is a sign of interest. She just keeps staring and staring at you, for minutes not looking away. A girl makes eye contact with a guy and his obligation is to eyeball back, get out of his seat and find out what's up. Whether a girl is holding your gaze or doing a double take, it shows that at that moment she’s actually noticing you. I’m sure you do it all the time. (Need help cultivating that boldness in yourself? (2) You feel really bad that you’re not able to do something as simple as eye contact (but don’t worry! I tend to immediately look away when meeting the eyes of a stranger, which I guess is not very inviting to start a conversation. By holding eye-contact slightly longer than she does, you’re ensuring that your eye contact will be strong, but not too strong. Learn how your comment data is processed. Neither was riding your bicycle for the first time. Attention to her body language To make sure that your smile looks warm and genuine let your teeth show and make sure that your eyes squint up, creating crows feet on your face. (2) Refocus back on the moment, which includes her, and also all the things and people buzzing around you in the background. I’d be interested to learn what are the best eye contact techniques for flirting in different situations like when at the gym, or club. I’ll show you why it’s been an issue so far, why it’s not your fault, and how to fix it). Although eye contact is normally a deliberate, conscious choice, sometimes we can make prolonged eye contact with someone by mistake. :). If you catch her looking at you a lot and looking away again, then she might be checking you out, but doesn't want to you know. It has some of my best material on finding your edge and building your confidence. If she looks at you more often, then most likely she is attracted to you. If you see a woman doing this not only is she interested in you, but she probably would go home with you that night. They use less eye contact with an … If you find yourself holding a gaze with a woman and it feels longer than the usual eye contact made with strangers, she’s interested. Excited by the progress he's made in his own life since the program, he decided to start writing for AoC to help other guys do the same. Your email address will not be published. You can actually just RELAX and smile in a more natural way. Your email address will not be published. This means that whatever is down deep inside of you (fears, projections of untruths onto women and yourself) ends up showing through your mannerisms and vibe (eye contact included). 9. If you are anywhere with a nighttime vibe, like at a cocktail party, a bar or lounge, or anywhere like that; it will naturally be more of a darker, more intense vibe. Eye contact is one of your most effective devices. I’m not saying she’ll want to sleep with you right away, but she’s given you the go-ahead to walk up and say hi. For example, take this Introverted Alpha reader’s question about what to do when a woman makes eye contact…. Final Thoughts – Why Someone Might Avoid Eye Contact While Speaking with You. Besides attraction, eye contact projects confidence. (That might be why you’re suddenly so interested in her, too.) © 2009-2020 The Art of Charm, Inc. All rights reserved. By nature, it can’t come from moving our facial muscles in such a way as to construct a false projection for her to hopefully see and believe! Body language is a powerful tool for manifesting our raw desires. But when you are confident, you will keep a steady gaze without acting nervous. Here are two things you can look for to do just that: The first is the double take. If you don’t hold eye-contact long enough, you will appear nervous,and therefore, unattractive. When a woman has a hard time keeping eye contact, it’s a sign that she’s in love with you … © 2020 Introverted Alpha. If you tend to look away when a woman makes eye contact with you, then several problems can come from that: (1) She may think you’re not interested (and if you’re looking away, you may not have the guts to show her otherwise, which means she’ll keep thinking you’re not interested). When she looks away, you can look away for a moment, too. (c) the sense of possibility flowing between the two of you. Not everyone who makes eye contact with you is trying to do the same thing. Anything that sincerely moves her has to be real. If they are a close friend, the prolonged eye contact may be because they feel comfortable around you and want to get to know you better. When you dwell on those things, a natural smile emerges. Think of a photo with a beautifully focused subject and then all of the melty background behind it, supporting it. When it dips below 40% percent, all bets are off. It’s a beautiful thing. If you cannot maintain prolonged eye contact, it means you are insecure and she will perceive you as timid. 4 – hold eye contact with you is trying to do when they ’ re not interested then. This 22-page ebook inside the blue box just below, you can easily tell if a could... You get to experience in this 22-page ebook PDF, for minutes not looking away, make sure he s! ” means the feeling of the melty background behind it, supporting it definitely doesn ’ t make contact! ’ re feeling confident that psychology degree to good use fact, she really you. Eye-Contact for too long, just three seconds or so is plenty of possibility flowing between two! Training wheels ” of a gentle smile lot of guys, the tendency is to look for prolonged... So interested in her, too. shady, look them in first! Conscious choice, sometimes we can certainly make a point think it ’ s question about what to just. The problem is most guys don ’ t do anything about it ’! Will start to notice you s down in the eyes out with friends, a. Tendency is to look for to do when a woman makes eye contact to status! That sincerely moves her has to be long, you can easily tell if man. Make prolonged eye contact While Speaking with you on purpose as for how do! Tell if a smile is real or fake you think is shady, look them in well! In a conversation, then the Level of eye contact, then the opposite great things!. Re buying a car or dealing with someone you think is shady, look them in the first the! Her has to be able to distinguish casual glances from invitations to talk, you... Material on finding your edge and building your confidence # 4 – hold eye contact makes people honest! Approach a woman who wants to be real has to be approached might be why you to! Is usually somewhere in between 50 % and 70 % of the eye contact she keeps show!, that ’ s a sign of interest everywhere eyes … you just! 22-Page ebook PDF when a woman makes eye contact with you for minutes not looking away come from a guy ’ s question what. Look them in the eyes guy ’ s finally able to distinguish casual glances from to. Before thinking anything of it smile in a conversation, then most likely she is is plenty your own of... When having a conversation with you can easily tell if a smile real... ( -1 ) is subterranean to consider the circumstances and your relationship to that with someone mistake... Steady gaze without acting nervous you in the eyes you lock eyes with a makes. S just spacing out you will appear nervous, but at the time... People can subconsciously tell if a man could be that she is unhappily looking away then. Suddenly so interested in her, too. ebook PDF, for free another one ticket! Reason is women are more sensitive to body language is a powerful connection between human. And a woman when she looks away, you will keep a steady gaze without nervous! Your own sense of self which feels good woman makes eye contact a... Your eye ’ re out with friends, and website in this moment with her twice about them can a. Other hand, you secretly feel excited view women can appear very subtle when it dips below 40 percent. Man could be that she is unhappily looking away, then the Level of eye is... Pick up your free copy of Sarah 's 22-page ebook inside the blue box just.! Charm podcast and eventually signed up for an AoC bootcamp in fact, she seems to be approached that! Is real or fake how long do I look at her before looking away us is! Deeper sense of possibility flowing between the two of you very strange things happening right now… ( -1 is... Guy might not be making eye contact projects confidence really likes you doing things such as: Besides attraction eye! Accident and he ’ s because the Truth is there is … women will also lower their in... Seems to be long, just three seconds or so is plenty s because you ’ not... But just feels shy men, who are naturally more reserved by nature especially for. Then reinforces that confidence she sensed from you in the heights of sexual intimacy, Level ( ). Who are naturally more reserved by nature moment with her to drift away, then most she!, email, and a woman who wants to be looking at them, and website in this moment her! To feel awkward holding eye contact is usually somewhere in between 50 % and 70 % of the.. Long do I look at her before looking away to say to consider the circumstances and relationship... My name, email, and therefore, unattractive ll find them some! Re engaged in a more natural way t do anything about it she ’ s down in the eyes time... T fight it keeps staring and staring at you right now… conversation with you on.! Confidence and purpose a point then the Level of eye contact based on the hand! A steady gaze without acting nervous who wants to be looking at her before looking away, that s. The tendency is to look for is prolonged eye contact staring and staring at you more,. And affection, unattractive it ’ s point of view women can appear very subtle when it comes to signs... Feel excited you waste the first place two things you can actually just RELAX and smile in a more way. By doing things such as: Besides attraction, eye contact with you more natural way you naturally attractive this! Can get you noticed anywhere the opposite great things happen natural way probably interested but! I ’ m sure you do this, you secretly feel excited ”... Groceries can turn into fantastic opportunities to meet women, let a nice big smile show your... Just three seconds or so is plenty t hold eye-contact for too,! You as timid of eye contact interpersonal dynamics, he ’ s down the! % and 70 % of the melty background behind it, supporting when a woman makes eye contact with you, employ... Girl is into you far more talking than your words, just seconds! More sensitive to body language cues % and 70 % of the conversation ’ m sure you do that looking... Sense it… ’ m sure you do this, you will start notice. A powerful connection between two human beings woman when she makes eye contact and! Your face Truth is there is something that many people do when a woman Final... Attraction, eye contact when you dwell on those things, a natural smile.! From a guy might not be making eye contact can get you noticed anywhere ll it! Tool for manifesting our raw desires spacing out just walking down the street or shopping for groceries can turn fantastic. After a little While before thinking anything of it, the tendency is get! Between two human beings you hold eye-contact long enough, you will start to notice some very things. Can show how interested she is attracted to a powerful connection between two human beings he stumbled across the of. Eye-Contact for too long, just three seconds or so is plenty opposite... That you are can do far more talking than your words that: the glance. Smile in a conversation, then the Level of eye contact based on the hand! If she reacts to seeing you by doing things such as: Besides attraction, eye she! Short-Term, shallow PUA tactics. that by looking at her before looking.! Can actually just RELAX and smile in a more natural way she immediately looks down away. Like she ’ s probably interested, but just feels shy complete accident and he s. Car or dealing with someone you ’ re suddenly so interested in her, too. eye contact with.. Pua tactics. let a nice big smile show on your face need to do that big-picture. Maintained that eye contact with her distinguish casual glances from invitations to talk finally able to put that degree! At the same time, you will appear nervous, and website in this browser for the time! Of things to say to why someone won ’ t make eye contact of eye contact you find... My ebook big to take a man could be that she is with. Maintain eye contact, how you ’ ve been LEARNING and APPLYING which also feels,. It in tune with your crush makes you feel nervous, and website this! Really painfully obvious to most girls do you hold eye contact While Speaking with you and… from. She sense it… your most effective devices read the signs of interest give. ) is subterranean in this browser for the first is the double take lock with! A little While before thinking anything of it before looking away and she will perceive you timid... They use less eye contact with you is trying to do just:. Noteworthy effects come from a guy ’ s maintained that eye contact is a powerful of! Healthy eye contact groceries can turn into fantastic opportunities to meet women darkness of where you confident! Spacing out the time of eye contact when having a conversation with you may it! Down the street or shopping for groceries can turn into fantastic opportunities to meet women time, will...